Communion Reprints #2 – Kamelot’s “The Black Halo”
(The general intro regarding what these ‘Communion Reprints’ are all about can be found here).
As I’ve alluded to on this blog before, the real difficulty that you’ll encounter if people are sending you a load of stuff to write about is finding something to say about the ‘mediocre’ stuff, which obviously constitutes the vast majority of everything. If it’s good or bad then you’ll be able to relay the observations that led you to that viewpoint; if it simply exists with no particularly strong positive or negative qualities then things can be a lot harder. This review of “The Black Halo” by Kamelot was me getting around the problem by being silly and having fun. I amused myself again, even if this time no-one else actually said they found it funny.
Excerpts from the diary of King Arthur (ed. Russ L)
Monday – Another crap day. Lancelot still thinks he can play me for a punk. Bwoy thinks I don’t notice those glances to Guinevere. Stay cool though Art, he’ll put his foot in it soon enough, and verily my wrath will be considerable. Yoot wants to play my game but he can’t. Fuckin’ French, you just can’t trust ‘em.
The new court minstrels are pissing me off already. ‘Kamelot’ they call themselves. Ever since the Mortal Kombat jousting tournament every man wants to use a ‘k’ instead of a ‘c’. I’ll have to have a word, that shit ain’t happening at the kourt of this king.
I was hyped for their arrival – they play metal and I’m a man who walks around carrying a sword, it’s a match made in heaven. These troubadours are power/progging it up in a manner similar to Queensryche, but they’re just boring. It’s very well played and produced and blah blah blah blah all the rest of it, but the musicianship doesn’t get them as far as doing anything interesting and the shiny, shiny production is actually a detriment. They didn’t have a single hook or interesting bit of playing to draw me in.
Gonna sign off now, I’m playing snooker with Merlin at nine. If that Welsh fucker turns my cue into a frog again I’ll ‘ave him. He’s been warned.